Lately, I have been reliving some of the exciting details of my early love-life. So far, we have sweated through the uncontrolled passion of my encounters with Claudia and Semadar (scroll down to read those articles).
Fortunately, I have been able to keep the sordid stories from my naive and vulnerable wife, but it has been quite challenging. I am not so sure she could handle the mountain of stress, knowing that the man she has been living with for all of these years was once an unmatched Globetrotter of Love. That was my SLBP (Secret Life Before Patty). But, as I see it, I have an absolute obligation to share the red-hot details with my readers, no matter how damning the truth might be. The greater good must prevail. So, now that we have that out of the way, let me tell you about Doreen.
Doreen and I were essentially forced together by fate. Apparently, our parents had one of those prearranged agreements in place. In fact, they didn’t make any attempt to hide their nefarious objectives. They bought homes on the same block, just a few doors apart which enabled nature’s hot juices to take over from there: And, did they ever!!!
It all happened in an old shed in our back yard that must have been left abandoned just for our benefit. It was my very first real kiss of a real girl. It was 2 months before my 9th birthday.
One day, Doreen wandered over to my home as she did several times before. Eventually, we found ourselves inside that shed. Just when my defenses were down, the scheming and sensuous young vixen introduced the topic of “kissing”. I must admit I had not given it any thought prior to that, but being the irresistible hunk that I was, I should have known it was inevitable.
As the event approached, she revealed an even deeper and secret objective. “Let’s kiss like movie stars” she requested. Apparently she had been paying attention to things like that, but I wasn’t exactly sure what distinguished movie star kisses from my own lip-locking techniques. I quickly recalled the several times I had secretly kissed the mirror in the bathroom, just to see what I looked like when I puckered up. As I thought about it, it was clear I was up to the task. The truth is, I probably would have been willing to kiss "like chainsaws" if that was what she wanted.
Eventually, we eased into position, then closer, then to the inevitable point of no return. She reached out her arms, obviously longing for my gentle touch. I played it cool, just like I thought any big-shot movie star would do. But, my suave and debonair demeanor was hopelessly irresistible. Her trembling arms strengthened as she pulled me closer. I puckered up to the point that my luscious lips resembled a woodpecker’s beak sucking on a lemon, - just like my mirror buddy’s did. I was ready to give her the thrill of her life.
Then she closed her eyes and dived into the sugary-sweet lip dessert that I had waiting for her. If you are wondering how I know her eyes were closed, it is because mine were wide open, and roughly the size of baseballs. In my quest to fulfill her deep-rooted fantasy, I emulated a movie star by rotating my head in large clockwise circles at roughly the same speed as a wheel on a dragster at the finish line. She didn’t seem to mind the obvious fact that our noses kept crashing into each other as the lightning-fast circles were completed.
Around and around I went, with puckered up woodpecker lips and wide-open eyes, just like the movie stars do it. Eventually, just before she nearly fainted with excitement, it was over. The whole thing lasted about 5 seconds, but the memory of kissing “on the big screen” will last me forever.
If you are a woman, I will understand if you have to run and get a glass of ice-cold water now to cool down a bit. If you are a fellow, I pity you for your inability to compete with my awesome amorous adventures. Here’s a special hint for you: Get a mirror.
Be sure to visit my other blog.
Fortunately, I have been able to keep the sordid stories from my naive and vulnerable wife, but it has been quite challenging. I am not so sure she could handle the mountain of stress, knowing that the man she has been living with for all of these years was once an unmatched Globetrotter of Love. That was my SLBP (Secret Life Before Patty). But, as I see it, I have an absolute obligation to share the red-hot details with my readers, no matter how damning the truth might be. The greater good must prevail. So, now that we have that out of the way, let me tell you about Doreen.
Doreen and I were essentially forced together by fate. Apparently, our parents had one of those prearranged agreements in place. In fact, they didn’t make any attempt to hide their nefarious objectives. They bought homes on the same block, just a few doors apart which enabled nature’s hot juices to take over from there: And, did they ever!!!
It all happened in an old shed in our back yard that must have been left abandoned just for our benefit. It was my very first real kiss of a real girl. It was 2 months before my 9th birthday.
One day, Doreen wandered over to my home as she did several times before. Eventually, we found ourselves inside that shed. Just when my defenses were down, the scheming and sensuous young vixen introduced the topic of “kissing”. I must admit I had not given it any thought prior to that, but being the irresistible hunk that I was, I should have known it was inevitable.
As the event approached, she revealed an even deeper and secret objective. “Let’s kiss like movie stars” she requested. Apparently she had been paying attention to things like that, but I wasn’t exactly sure what distinguished movie star kisses from my own lip-locking techniques. I quickly recalled the several times I had secretly kissed the mirror in the bathroom, just to see what I looked like when I puckered up. As I thought about it, it was clear I was up to the task. The truth is, I probably would have been willing to kiss "like chainsaws" if that was what she wanted.
Eventually, we eased into position, then closer, then to the inevitable point of no return. She reached out her arms, obviously longing for my gentle touch. I played it cool, just like I thought any big-shot movie star would do. But, my suave and debonair demeanor was hopelessly irresistible. Her trembling arms strengthened as she pulled me closer. I puckered up to the point that my luscious lips resembled a woodpecker’s beak sucking on a lemon, - just like my mirror buddy’s did. I was ready to give her the thrill of her life.
Then she closed her eyes and dived into the sugary-sweet lip dessert that I had waiting for her. If you are wondering how I know her eyes were closed, it is because mine were wide open, and roughly the size of baseballs. In my quest to fulfill her deep-rooted fantasy, I emulated a movie star by rotating my head in large clockwise circles at roughly the same speed as a wheel on a dragster at the finish line. She didn’t seem to mind the obvious fact that our noses kept crashing into each other as the lightning-fast circles were completed.
Around and around I went, with puckered up woodpecker lips and wide-open eyes, just like the movie stars do it. Eventually, just before she nearly fainted with excitement, it was over. The whole thing lasted about 5 seconds, but the memory of kissing “on the big screen” will last me forever.
If you are a woman, I will understand if you have to run and get a glass of ice-cold water now to cool down a bit. If you are a fellow, I pity you for your inability to compete with my awesome amorous adventures. Here’s a special hint for you: Get a mirror.
Be sure to visit my other blog.
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