One of the fun things about a “Human Interest” blog is there are a broad range of topics to draw from. In my case, my large family has some interesting quirks. Hugging is right near the top of the list. That may because of the unusually high female population among the group.
I have been blessed with 6 sisters. Between them, they have had 12 daughters but only 4 sons (so far that is 18 girls to 4 boys). Patty’s core family is also loaded with girls, and so are our extended families. As you would expect, I am the oddball in this equation: I have 2 sons, no daughters.
With that many women around, you can bet there is some serious hugging going on. Women are trained for it. When they are little, they are taught to hug their dollies as well as their mommy and daddy and their siblings. Before long they are experts at hugging their immediate family and then their grandparents. From there. it spreads to other family members, their friends, their pets, other people’s babies, people at church, and eventually their spouses and then their own children, and the circle begins again. My wife even runs out to hug the mail man every day (not really).
Most men are willing participants in hug-a-thons, but they are generally less enthusiastic. My Uncle Johnnie was an exception, and so was my dear friend, Ed. He came from an Italian family where they are all hug-freaks. The men in their family even hug each other a lot. But for the rest of us fellows, I think we enjoy the “bumpers” that women bring to the embrace, as much as we enjoy the affection.
Nobody ever talks about it very much, but it is a bit weird when you hug a mom or a sister and their boobs get in the middle of it all. You don’t particularly think of them in a sexual way, but you can’t help but notice that your body is being nudged in odd places. The tall girls bump you in the chest, and the shorter ones poke you just below the rib cage. And then there are the short grandmas who have fallen victim to the long-term effects of gravity,…but, lets not even go there.
I can’t help but wonder how women secretly handle this boob-matter when they hug each other. I would expect that they try not to notice such things, but who do they think they are kidding? Women notice the smallest details about each other, right down to wedding rings, minor hair cuts and various facial expressions. They are masters at gathering information. No tidbit of information is too trivial to ignore. If they are that obsessed with the subtle and simple day-to-day things, it is hard to believe they don’t observe the mass of femininity that competes for the space in between hugs. Do the small breasted ones feel a sense of envy? Do the bigger ones kinda push each other around, like sumo wrestlers? I think I am gonna start watching their faces for telltale signals when I catch two women in the act of hugging.
There are certain situations that really lend themselves to hugging, especially among the feminine gender. Have you ever noticed the hug-fest that bonds them together at funerals and weddings, or when one of them has a baby? These are the types of events that draw out the best of their heart-felt hugs. The signals are clear. The affection flows by the bucketful. In those special moments, a simple genuine hug communicates more effectively than any words or anything else.
And then there are hug pats. Sometimes when people want to lend emphasis to their hugs, they pat the other person on the back. Other times the hug-patting sends a not-so-delicate signal that the patter is ready to terminate the hug. If you want to have fun with people like that hold your hugs an extra 10 seconds or so and watch how aggressive their patting becomes, then tell them what you are doing and tell them I put you up to it, You will both enjoy the moment.
So hugs are an important part of the American spirit. They say a lot, even though no words are spoken. Many of us start out our days with hugs and sneak a few in as the day moves along. They make us feel better. There is never a wrong time for a hug and some situations are custom-made for them…like when we say “Goodbye”.
More on that in the next article. Until then, keep hugging.
UPDATE: Our family has been blessed because one of my sisters had "another daughter" who has fallen out of the sky for us all to enjoy. Many, many years ago, Carol was forced to put Julie up for adoption, but we have been recently reunited. Guess what she told me today: "I give good hugs." It figures!
Be sure to buzz on over to my other blog.
I have been blessed with 6 sisters. Between them, they have had 12 daughters but only 4 sons (so far that is 18 girls to 4 boys). Patty’s core family is also loaded with girls, and so are our extended families. As you would expect, I am the oddball in this equation: I have 2 sons, no daughters.
With that many women around, you can bet there is some serious hugging going on. Women are trained for it. When they are little, they are taught to hug their dollies as well as their mommy and daddy and their siblings. Before long they are experts at hugging their immediate family and then their grandparents. From there. it spreads to other family members, their friends, their pets, other people’s babies, people at church, and eventually their spouses and then their own children, and the circle begins again. My wife even runs out to hug the mail man every day (not really).
Most men are willing participants in hug-a-thons, but they are generally less enthusiastic. My Uncle Johnnie was an exception, and so was my dear friend, Ed. He came from an Italian family where they are all hug-freaks. The men in their family even hug each other a lot. But for the rest of us fellows, I think we enjoy the “bumpers” that women bring to the embrace, as much as we enjoy the affection.
Nobody ever talks about it very much, but it is a bit weird when you hug a mom or a sister and their boobs get in the middle of it all. You don’t particularly think of them in a sexual way, but you can’t help but notice that your body is being nudged in odd places. The tall girls bump you in the chest, and the shorter ones poke you just below the rib cage. And then there are the short grandmas who have fallen victim to the long-term effects of gravity,…but, lets not even go there.
I can’t help but wonder how women secretly handle this boob-matter when they hug each other. I would expect that they try not to notice such things, but who do they think they are kidding? Women notice the smallest details about each other, right down to wedding rings, minor hair cuts and various facial expressions. They are masters at gathering information. No tidbit of information is too trivial to ignore. If they are that obsessed with the subtle and simple day-to-day things, it is hard to believe they don’t observe the mass of femininity that competes for the space in between hugs. Do the small breasted ones feel a sense of envy? Do the bigger ones kinda push each other around, like sumo wrestlers? I think I am gonna start watching their faces for telltale signals when I catch two women in the act of hugging.
There are certain situations that really lend themselves to hugging, especially among the feminine gender. Have you ever noticed the hug-fest that bonds them together at funerals and weddings, or when one of them has a baby? These are the types of events that draw out the best of their heart-felt hugs. The signals are clear. The affection flows by the bucketful. In those special moments, a simple genuine hug communicates more effectively than any words or anything else.
And then there are hug pats. Sometimes when people want to lend emphasis to their hugs, they pat the other person on the back. Other times the hug-patting sends a not-so-delicate signal that the patter is ready to terminate the hug. If you want to have fun with people like that hold your hugs an extra 10 seconds or so and watch how aggressive their patting becomes, then tell them what you are doing and tell them I put you up to it, You will both enjoy the moment.
So hugs are an important part of the American spirit. They say a lot, even though no words are spoken. Many of us start out our days with hugs and sneak a few in as the day moves along. They make us feel better. There is never a wrong time for a hug and some situations are custom-made for them…like when we say “Goodbye”.
More on that in the next article. Until then, keep hugging.
UPDATE: Our family has been blessed because one of my sisters had "another daughter" who has fallen out of the sky for us all to enjoy. Many, many years ago, Carol was forced to put Julie up for adoption, but we have been recently reunited. Guess what she told me today: "I give good hugs." It figures!
Be sure to buzz on over to my other blog.
2 comments:
So I have to say that as a male I fall into the extra hugger catagory. I am however a very touchy feely person. I take more from touch than any spoken word, look, or written page. I can honestly say "I NEED hugs" they are not just a way of greeting or way to convey sympathy, for me they are what let me know I am loved. I have two daughters and one of them is a very non touchy person, the other is a hugger just like me. Nothing rights the world toa perfect state of order than a three year old with their arms thrown wide running up for a hug.
It is very much a cultural thing. I know we've met many people from other countries through the au pair program, and as an American woman, my first instinct when I meet the loved one of someone dear to me is to hug them. I can tell this catches them off guard as they are holding out their hand for me to shake it and I embrace them in a hug instead. I don't intend to make them uncomfortable, that's just how I greet people I care about. Handshakes are for co-workers, not friends.
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