It was too late for the pimple-faced fellow to get up early, so he buried his head in his pillow and resorted to his usual practice of sleeping in. He had essentially just wasted three of the most precious months of his young life in the same way. He was lazy, immature, naive and basically oblivious to anything that did not directly affect him. There were only a few weeks remaining until he would attend his first day of high school. The lackluster lad had no reason to suspect that this would be the most influential day he would ever experience.
It all started exactly one year earlier, when the next-door neighbors elected to move away. Their only child, a son, was one year the senior to the pimple-faced boy. The two adolescents and their families lived in the poor part of town, so their resources were meager, but each of the young fellows owned a baseball mitt. Predictably, they filled countless hours, simply playing catch.
The local high-school earned an especially seedy reputation, so the parents of the neighbor boy dreaded the thought of their son attending such a school. The 80-year old building had been neglected for years. Bars on the windows lent the impression that it was a medium-security prison. The question was, were the bars to keep the unruly students in, or to keep the neighborhood bad-guys out.
Everything was run down. The lighting was poor. The halls were narrow and over-crowded. Students from years gone by had carved their initials into desktops. The restroom stalls had no doors on them because even the smallest amount of privacy afforded sanctuary for illegal activities that so often occurred.
Graffiti was commonplace. The janitors could not remove it as fast as the street artists painted colorful insults, directed at their rival gangs (About Gangs). Fighting was common, even among the girls. Occasionally, stories about bloody knife-fights and gang-fights would end up on the nightly news. Every year there were a hand-full of students who just used their school years as a stopping place on their way to jail or the state prison. Dozens of students had probation officers, while hundreds of them smoked and drank (fairly common now).
Teenage pregnancy was routine in the school. A high percentage of students dropped out. Of those who stuck it out, apathy about their school, their homes and their futures was inevitable. The less violent kids took refuge from the environment by laying their heads on their desks and sleeping away the classroom hours. The teachers “gave” passing grades to any students who did not cause trouble.
Anybody with an ounce of common sense would want to escape such a hopeless culture. The parents of the neighbor boy were determined to do precisely that. And so they moved away to a small town, with a small-town mentality and Pimples was left behind.
On the July day in discussion, the phone rang at 9:00 am. It was the older boy. He was coming to town and he wanted to play catch with Pimples. The year was 1964. The Beatles were headed to the US for their very first tour. They had just released their incredibly successful album, “A Hard Days Night” and their songs dominated the airways. “Can't Buy Me Love” was blaring on an old radio when the mother of the pimple-faced fellow announced the now-historic phone call. It was his former neighbor.
“Do you want to play catch?”
He did.
Later that day, the two young teenagers met as agreed. There was a large side-yard next to the younger lad’s home so they grabbed their old mitts and a radio and headed there. As they threw the grass-stained baseball back and forth, John Lennon was singing “I Should Have Known Better” in the background.
The small talk eventually yielded to a discussion about the infamous high-school, which awaited Pimples. Then suddenly, and without any forethought the older youth blurted out a bizarre question that even he did not know he was going to ask, “Would you like to move in with us, and go to high-school in our small town?” Just as impulsively, Pimples instinctively and enthusiastically agreed. More incredibly, and for reasons known only to God himself, the parents also approved of the impromptu plot. And so it was! The pimple-faced youngster packed his bags.
The small town high school was brand new. There was no graffiti, no apathy and no gangs. Instead, there was a strong sense of community and school spirit. The younger fellow made the football team and was shocked when the entire town shut down on Fridays to watch the games. The teachers actually cared about the students and the students genuinely liked and respected the teachers. The young pimple-faced lad liked the girls a lot better too. No doubt, he had made the correct choice.
In the winter of his senior year, the school organized a skiing weekend and Pimples went along. By the afternoon of the first day, he had made several ski runs down the mountain, and he still had time for one more run. He arrived at the chair-lift at the exact same time as one of his classmates. It just made sense to share the next chair. Her name was Patty.
Pimples already knew of Patty, but he had never really taken the time to talk with her until that day. He immediately liked her and over the next few months their relationship grew. Then they got more serious, and eventually they got married and raised their own family.
It has been over 45 years since that ironic question came completely “out of left field” while two young fellows were playing catch. But more significantly, earlier that same morning, the younger fellow, Pimples, received the most important phone call of his life.
“Do you want to play catch?”
He did.
In case you have not figured it out, Patty is my wife and I am Pimples. We will celebrate our 40th anniversary later this year, “And I Love Her” (song five on that poignant album).
The old high school is still struggling.
The small-town school is still doing well.
A 16 year-old modern day gang member tells his story
Comments are invited
We are discussing insurance scams on my other blog.
Facebook and MySpace provide ample evidence that lots of people enjoy voicing their opinions. However the format does not allow for much more than a few sentences per entry. Sometimes people need several consecutive entries to complete their thought.
Considering the above, I thought it would be fun to invite people to expand on nearly any topic of their choosing, and then post their articles, as guest writers, on one of my blogs. Several of them have asked me about the structure or limits of the project.
Toward that end, I have listed below some simple guidelines for writing good blog articles. However, my guest writers are not required, or even encouraged, to abide by any of them. That would be like inviting somebody to a party and then requiring them to drive a particular car to the event. This exercise is about the party, not the car.
But, for those who do want to fit within typical blog structure, here are a few pointers.
• Your primary objective is simply to make a statement that is important or interesting to you. Pick a topic that you feel passionate about. Jot down 2-5 points that will best help you to develop your thought.
• Have an introduction, a body and a conclusion. Put another way: Tell them what you are going to tell them; Then tell them; Then tell them what you told them.
• Facts are fine, but opinions are better because there is room for debate and discussion. So, a sentence such as “All children are imperfect” is not as thought-provoking as “It is time to teach the kids of today some old fashioned manners.” In the second sentence, a reader might want to argue that kids are no worse today than some other time, or old-fashioned manners were unnecessarily stern.
• It helps search engines to know what the article is about if you use a brief but complete thought in your Headline– Examples: Vegetarians are Happier; or, Michael Jackson: Singer, Dancer; or, Seniors Entitlement Attitude: Selfish.
• The less you say, the more likely someone will read it. A good blog article contains 100-500 words. (A typed page is about 300 words). If it is much longer than that, it is generally better to split the information into multiple articles.
• Link, link, link. Identify other blogs or websites which offer supporting, contradictory, background, or qualifying arguments. A good rule of thumb is one link per 100 words, but not less than three links for the entire article. You cannot have too many links.
• If you are having difficulty getting started, try writing your article as if it is a letter to a friend. Then search the web for information that will support or add to the content, and that provides your links.
• After you have finished your article, set it aside for at least two hours (over night is better) and then proof read it when you have a fresh mind. There is a good likelihood you will discover some ways to spruce up your work.
• Comment and participate with other bloggers. The object of a blog is to engage others and discuss the topic. So if you have an opinion, blogs afford a great environment to develop your thoughts; but, don’t take it too seriously if somebody else disagrees with you. That is the point.
Other good sources for information on how to write effective blog articles include Frugal Marketing, Pro Blogger, and Copy Blogger (see how easy that was).
Frugal marketing: http://www.frugalmarketing.com/dtb/killer-blog-posts.shtml
Pro Blogger: http://www.problogger.net/archives/2005/12/30/tens-tips-for-writing-a-blog-post/
Copy Blogger: http://www.copyblogger.com/write-article-fast/
If you know somebody who would like to write a guest article, I would love to discuss it.
Don't forget to check in with my Family Finances Blog: Currently discussing Insurance Scams
How much clutter is hanging around your home? Before you answer that, let’s define what qualifies as clutter. If you are homeless and have so many possessions they do not all fit into your backpack, you might have too much clutter. In the other extreme you might own a mansion, filled with items and yet there is plenty of open space. So, for our purposes clutter does not have as much to do with how much stuff one has, but how much “unnecessary” stuff one has.
In my previous article we had a nice discussion about Pack Rats or as they are sometimes called, “Hoarders”. These people differ from traditional collectors because the Pack Rat just can’t bring herself to getting rid of things. This is a fairly common problem for elderly people who lived through the days when people had to be more resourceful. In the more sever cases the person might even be diagnosed as suffering from “Compulsive Hoarder Syndrome” or CHS.
CHS is not just some harmless character flaw. If left unchecked, it can lead to all sorts of problems. In one tragic case, one of twin-hoarders resulted in an unnecessary death. Another man died in a Chicago fire because of all of his clutter. In yet another example, a woman became so distraught about her clutter, she just did not care about anything any more. Her family made this heart-wrenching video.
Consider these other problems:
• False value - It can be dangerous to lend too much value to used material goods. The bible refers to it as idolatry. But we have money tied up in those items so they seem valuable to us. In the mean time, there are people sleeping under bridges who could use your old clothes and there are libraries and other individuals who could read your books. etc. So does your twelfth coat really offer more value in a box on the floor of your garage or on the back of a homeless mother?
• Sanitation – Rodents and insects need food and shelter. If there is a little water nearby, a closet full of junk may just provide an ideal place for them to call home.
• Safety – People have died because of their piles of debris. Piles have fallen on them. Others have been unable to get through their own maze of accumulations
In the beginning, the hoarder may just keep piling things up in cabinets and closets but eventually their belongings spill over into bigger areas like a basement or a garage, or even an entire apartment building. In my first book, Instant Experience for Real Estate Agents, I told a true story about a vacant 12-unit apartment building which we bought. The former managers were Pack Rats. Their particular attraction was for bicycles and bicycle parts. Apparently they roamed the alleys and brought home any bikes they discovered. The bikes were not new and flashy, or even operable, so they must have been collected one at a time over many years from the dumpsters. It took nearly two large construction dumpsters to get rid of them all.
One woman I know collects pets. Like other Hoarders she sees a certain value in abandoned dogs and cats. When one of those cats has a litter, she just doesn’t have the heart to hand them over to a shelter. She is elderly and her mind is not working well. Her CHS has affected her ability to recognize that all of her animals need homes and neutered so the problem does not get worse. Her home smells so bad she no longer accepts visitors. Her own ailments make it difficult for her to take care of the animals correctly and she cannot get out much so she just sits there in the stench, not knowing what else to do. According to Animal Sheltering, there are certain common traits that animal hoarders share. Meanwhile the pack of dogs and the clowder of cats grows, and grows. She can’t even tell you how many pets she has.
Another woman I know had hidden her affliction with CHS until she died. When her heirs cleaned up, they were shocked to find 80 cartons of cigarettes stuffed in cabinets. There were also cases of beer from decades earlier (remember the old pull-top cans). She had over 50 pairs of shoes that still had tags on them. There was a stock-pile of unused purses and countless rolls of toilet paper and napkins. The cigs and paper products were cheap generic brands or purchased with discount coupons. The shoes and purses were all purchased off of the markdown racks, frequently for a just few dollars a pair. A clear mind would have known there is no rational justification for one person to have 80 cartons of cigarettes, or so many of those other items, but a person suffering from CHS does not have a clear mind.
Do not suppose that men are exempt from CHS disease. I have known them too. One gentleman, now in his 80’s, has stuffed every spare inch of his garage with something that he imagines he might use…someday. He even has buckets of old nuts and bolts he has picked up off the streets; one such bucket is exclusively for bent nails. Another fellow I know, had so many unfinished projects in his garage and basement it all added to a cluttered and troubled mind. Eventually, he got so depressed about his inability to contain his life, he ended it prematurely.
It is not uncommon for the offspring of Pack Rats to suffer from CHS as well. An article in the Seattle Times reveals that studies are being done right now but indications are that hoarding runs in families. Apparently, when children see bad habits, over many years, that behavior begins to appear normal to them. Before long, they mimic that behavior. In my own life, one parent was a bit of a Hoarder and the other leaned toward purging. I am more like the latter. One of my kids tends to accumulate things, but the other one does not.
I have to admit that I am a bit concerned for my wife in this regard. We have too much furniture in our home and any flat surface is packed with picture frames. One day about a month ago, she admitted to me that she has many more picture frames hidden away somewhere. The actuary tables suggest I will leave this world before she does and since she is a sentimentalist, I suspect our home will continue to get more crowded as the years pass.
The last two times we cleaned out “our” closets, I got rid of about 25% of my clothes, half of my books and all of my CD’s. She threw in a few CD’s, one coat and a pair of shoes. She said that all of her other shoes have specific purposes…whatever that could be. It seems to me that one pair of black shoes, one pair of brown shoes, a couple pairs of tennis shoes and a pair or two of boots ought to be enough, but … what do I know?
My cousin, Bonnie, dropped me a note and said that she is a purger: If she hasn’t used something for a couple of years, out it goes. My Dad was even more radical. His timeline was six months, except for seasonal items like garden hoses or snow shovels. One year Patty and I gave him a popcorn-popper for Christmas. Later that year, around the 4th of July, he held his annual garage sale and that popcorn popper, new in the box, was prominently displayed on his table. Patty and I bought it from him, at a huge discount, and used it for many years after that.
I think my cousin, Bonnie, and my Dad have the right idea. When it comes to possessions, a reasonable timeline ought to be observed. If the item hasn’t been used within that time, pass it along to somebody else who is not so enriched. Garage sales can be fun and useful for this purpose. Or, it is easy to find charities that will appreciate your discards. In our area there are all sorts of homeless shelters and humanitarian organizations. There are facilities for unwed parents, veterans, seniors and all sorts of other folks. Naturally, the Goodwill is always ready to assist in this regard.
The bottom line is hoarding can be unhealthy. It gives too much value to material things and not enough value to people. We all know a great deal of pleasure can be derived from giving. Why deny ourselves the pleasure of giving those things to somebody who will have an equally gratifying experience by accepting the symbol of your generosity?
Perhaps it is time for a good Spring cleaning.
A tragic Video of 70 collies that were victims of animal hoarding is provided by University of California, Davis.
For useful tips we amateur Pack Rats can employ to make sure we don’t get carried away are here.
Your thoughts?
Drop by my other blog. It is about family finances.
If you would like to write a guest article on a topic of your choice, let me know.
